This one is for the dudes.

Not that long ago, running errands at the mall with my fiance, I decided I needed to stop in Sephora really quick.  First, you should know I always need to stop in Sephora if we are at the mall.  Second, that “really quick” part is a total lie.  Knowing this, my man followed me in willingly (like he always does) but little did he know, today would be different.  Today instead of blindly following me around while interneting on his phone and muttering things to me such as “yeah, that color is nice…. ” he would discover MENS PRODUCTS!  Specifically the Jack Black Beard Lube.  A discovery made not out of interest in the actual product, but out of the very boy-like childish humor found in the name….. beard LUBE.  I know….  *sigh*   After he was through taking a picture of it and sending it to a friend and heh heh-ing about it like Beavis and Butthead, he actually became genuinely interested (I should note that he does shave with a blade and struggles with ingrown hairs and an overall irritation from shaving, and is always searching for the perfect shaving product).  Then came another discovery….. if you ask, they will give you a free SAMPLE!  So he brought some home, proceeded to try it AND love it!   And I bought him some for Valentine’s day (I am so thoughtful).  Which brings us to today and the writing of this post, requested by him, because he thinks it’s pretty great and…. “You should blog about this so all of your girlfriends go buy this for the men in their lives”    The End.

FOUND: the Secret-Yoga Career Pant

YOU GUYS. I have long held a dislike for career-wear. I like how I look in it, sure, but it makes me feel so very sad. I can’t move how I want to, I’m thinking too hard about my clothes, they have to be, you know, IRONED. Uuugh! I hate it. I really just want to wear yoga pants all the time, and sometimes I sneak them into the office, but I know I’m not fooling anyone.

The other day I fell into Old Navy out of boredom- I had no real shopping goals but I do like their V-necks. And then, because an evil genius marketing person put them in the exact right spot, I saw these:

rockstar demi

The Old Navy Rockstar Demi-Boot Jeans (in Black)

I’ve owned Rockstar jeans in the past, with mixed feelings- all the way from “Yay!” to “these are 4 sizes up from what I should be wearing and they still don’t fit!”. I own two pair of the Rockstar regular flare jeans- the “regular” length is fine with Vans but too short to wear with my Danskos; I found a pair of talls on clearance once, and they are ridiculously long and flared and make me look like a weird hippie. Good enough for “jeans days” at the office, but I’m definitely not winning any fashion prizes. For the new Demi-boot, Old Navy’s description reads “Half boot, half skinny, all cute. With added length to wear with heels.”

!!!!!! Ok, first off, they are in no way jeans. They have a few jean-esque details like rivets (black) and pockets, but that’s it. The fabric is absolutely not denim- more of a cotton twill? And it’s SUPER MEGA STRETCHY. Seriously, I was just lunging around in them and they just go with the flow. They are, indeed, long enough to make me look like a normal person in my Danskos, with just enough flare to say “why yes, these are smart pants, for smart ladies”. Also, the rise is not too tall but also not too short- I am totally sitting down and didn’t have to make any preparatory adjustments. BOOM.

The online reviews say they fade like a mothertrucker when you wash them, but maybe they’re just bad at laundry…? If they don’t fade too much I might have to stock up. Old Navy, please also release these in a normal, classic, slightly faded denim wash. DO IT.

These are totally career pants with all of the comfort of yoga pants. They look good and do not make me feel sad. I may or may not have worn them every day this week.

xo,

jess.

ps- this is not a sponsored post, but if Old Navy wants to send me a few pairs, that’d be a’ight.

ok, FINE. I kind of love “The Carrie Diaries”.

I know. I KNOW. Uuuugh!!

I set up the season pass on a lark. I loved Sex and the City in the late 90’s, and then I moved and didn’t have cable so I didn’t really stick with it, but now I will fall into the occasional Lifetime marathon and, you know, hang out with the girls. I never saw the movies though, so I’m totally not an expert.

When I first heard of The Carrie Diaries (a prequel, of sorts, also based on a book series by Candace Bushnell) I rolled my eyes SO HARD, but then, one night, half asleep in bed, I saw a commercial… and set up my TiVo. I completely forgot all about it until Pamela sent me a text last week saying she was drinking wine and watching it. So, I was super bored last Friday night, and realized I had three episodes piled up….

On the first episode, I was totally annoyed by the styling. I lived in the 80’s. Remember when we re-lived our 90’s? 80’s nostalgia is great. I will fully admit that I love that I can walk into Forever 21 and buy t-shirts with tigers and neon accessories, and believe me, I DO. But let’s look at how The Carrie Diaries depicts 80’s fashion:

carrie1Source: http://www.celebritystyleguide.com/i-1-1-13325/tv-shows/the-carrie-diaries/urban-outfitters-cooperative-conversational-pullover
Source: http://www.fashionbysai.com/2013/01/the-carrie-diaries-airs-tonight-on-etc.html
carrie 3Source: http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/2013/02/annasophia-robb-in-nyc-shooting-the-carrie-diaries.html

 

 

 

 

 

OMG adorbs!! I will buy one of each. And look!! You can actually go through all of the outfits of each episode and buy these items from Forever 21, Urban Outfitters, TopShop, H&M… (I really really need this unicorn sweater. NEEEEEEED.)

Ok, so yay! We love the 80’s!! But hold up: here’s how it actually looked:

16candlesSource: http://de.paperblog.com/the-look-of-sixteen-candles-1984-90459/
16candles2Source: http://images.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/Sixteen-Candles-sixteen-candles-55739_445_304.jpg

 

 

 

 

Eeeeeeeee. Molly, I agree with your sentiment. Wait! Here’s an adorable matching side-by-side of current “80’s” Carrie Bradshaw and actual 1980’s SJP:

RobbSource: http://www.teenvogue.com/entertainment/tv/2013-01/carrie-diaries-style-eric-daman/?intro
SJP80Source: http://images2.fanpop.com/images/photos/8000000/Girls-Just-Want-to-Have-Fun-the-80s-8003422-385-420.jpg

 

 

 

 

See? We had no concept of appropriate amounts of makeup, hairbrushes, or styling product technology.

Ok but let’s get beyond that. The show totally sucked me in because MARTHA JONES. And then because it’s actually cute? It follows the same format-ish of SATC, where Carrie is writing (literally, with a pen) in her diary and asks a question that supplies the theme of the show, which she then narrates. The supporting cast is also totally cute, and it’s sweet without being totally sugary. Ok, in true SATC style it is actually a little dirty, but in a real teen coming-of-age way, not in a gross, incestual Gossip Girl way.

I’ve seen some interweb rumbling about how the show doesn’t follow canon, but I’m not really bothered by that. If this was a Buffy prequel, I’d be all up in it’s accuracy, but I don’t really mind that I’ve never heard of Carrie’s sister before or that on SATC she was poor as a teen and would go without eating in order to buy a copy of Vogue instead of being the daughter of a lawyer in the suburbs.

(While writing this post, I totally fell down a 321-Contact SJP rabbit hole. You’ve been warned!!)

I think I realized what’s really sucking me in to this show, aside from Martha Jones: THE MUSIC. I know I’ll sound totally old by saying this but the 80’s were a time of musical perfection. Head Over Heels. Drive. Obligatory but perfect Blue Monday. White Horse. Why does “Overkill” make me stop everything I’m doing?? None of these songs make any sense together, and yet, they do.

Also I kind of loved this cover of Rockwell’s “Somebody’s Watching Me” that was in the Halloween episode. Sorry, ghost of MJ.

So tell me: what are you watching? With or without wine? What kind of wine? Can we share your wine?

xo,

jess.

images:

http://www.celebritystyleguide.com/i-1-1-13325/tv-shows/the-carrie-diaries/urban-outfitters-cooperative-conversational-pullover

http://www.fashionbysai.com/2013/01/the-carrie-diaries-airs-tonight-on-etc.html

http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/2013/02/annasophia-robb-in-nyc-shooting-the-carrie-diaries.html

http://de.paperblog.com/the-look-of-sixteen-candles-1984-90459/

http://images.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/Sixteen-Candles-sixteen-candles-55739_445_304.jpg

http://www.teenvogue.com/entertainment/tv/2013-01/carrie-diaries-style-eric-daman/?intro

http://images2.fanpop.com/images/photos/8000000/Girls-Just-Want-to-Have-Fun-the-80s-8003422-385-420.jpg

Hotels Pamela and I Have Stayed In, From Weirdest to Awesomest.

Pamela is one of my oldest friends. I mean, she’s not, like, my old lady friend- just, we’ve been friends for a really long time. Anyway, way back in the day, we agreed that we should totally travel together. But at this point in history, travel wasn’t really that easy; the internet was still new and sites like Orbitz and Travelocity seemed scary, and even scarier was the idea of walking into a travel agency. I mean, that was for fancy people! So years went by and we never traveled, because also we were poor 20 somethings.

Fast-forward to 2009: I was squirming at my desk (this was the year I was awkwardly employed, trying to find another teaching gig while keeping my business afloat), and sent an email to Pamela that went something like “OMG I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE LET’S GO TO NEW ORLEANS”. She agreed, and I think by later that week (day?) we were booked for a June adventure to the Crescent City. Do you know what’s oddly relaxing? Having a trip on the calendar to look forward to.

Pamela and I are good travel partners because we tend to agree that we don’t need a fancy hotel so long as it is reasonably priced, in a good location, is reasonably not sketchy, and has a bed and a shower. I mean really- don’t you always feel like it’s a waste when your hotel room is sooo nice and then you just leave it all day to go on adventures in your destination city?? No? That’s just me? Well whatever. Here are all the places we have stayed, in order from super weird to super awesome:

The Garfield Suites, Downtown Cincinnati, Ohio

In 2010, Shepard Fairey opened a limited run exhibit at the CAC in Cincinnati. Obviously, we HAD to go, so Pamela and I (and our men) hopped in the PT Cruiser and fled south. The show was worth it, but Cincinnati is not somewhere we’d choose to go again, I don’t think? Anyway, this was our room:

Source: jess

Jess: This place was straight up weird. But awesome! It was totally an apartment? Remember how it had 1980’s pots and pans in the kitchen? We should have cooked something.
Pamela: Totally weird. Also it might have been a parking garage turned into apartments, turned hotel. That’s the only way to explain the giant cement pillars at random spots through the, um, room?  Apartment?  I think we left leftover food in the full size refrigerator for the cleaning staff. I hope they enjoyed it.
Jess: I just thought about that too- that we totally left leftovers! Was it ribs?
Pamela: BBQ something. For sure.
Jess: Wasn’t Elton John always playing in the (impossibly long) hallways, too? For sure we heard “tiny dancer” more than once. and maybe “Benny and the Jets”.

PS- the tagline for the Garfield Suites is “Accommodations As Big As A House”. Accurate.

The Prince Conti, New Orleans, LA (French Quater)

prince conti elevatorSource: jess
4550_89763728958_203215_nThe Prince Conti was a gem! Located a block off Bourbon and across the street from a strip club (featuring 1000’s of beautiful girls and 3 ugly ones), Prince Conti was our shining knight. At night. Er, prince. Whatever- it was awesome and had weird cryptic wallpaper (above). NOLA 2009 was our first trip together, and will always hold a place in history as BEST TRIP EVER, NOW WITH MORE CANADIANS. But that’s a story for another day.

Jess: Oh, prince conti!! 1800’s switchboard. keys that were actual keys. Mysterious wallpaper…
Pamela: With a tv that seemed to endlessly play Legally Blonde and Land of the lost. And a very tiny bathroom.
Jess: Yes!! Legally Blonde was on for our entire trip except for the great afternoon of muffalutta illin’. Worth it.

The Flamingo, Las Vegas, NV (In the “newly remodeled” GO room)

73497_491575447287_2857555_nSource: jess
76776_491803622287_8382784_nSource: jess
Jess:
This was actually a pretty nice place- we had a bitchin’ view of the bellagio fountains. But the bathroom door didn’t close all the way, and the entire side of the building was Donnie and Marie. I think they’ve had some work done.
Pamela: They def have had some work done. This room was a pink and white explosion!  One of the coolest, yet not useful at all, things of that room – the tv built into the bathroom mirror. I think I watched something staring David Hasselhoff while putting on my makeup.
Jess: We were totally impressed by that bathroom mirror tv. Where did it come from?? There was no tv poking out the back side. I think we only turned it on that first day.

36282_480940988958_356567_nSource: jess

 

 

 

 

 

An Apartment in Clinton Hill, Brooklyn, NY

Summer of 2012, we FINALLY made it to New York City together. Lyn was there, too!! Hotels in NYC are super expensive, so we tried something new and used Airbnb.com and rented the most adorable apartment from the most adorable couple at a ridiculously reasonable rate:

nyc aptSource: https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/284682

Jess: I wanted to live here.
Pamela: I loved this apartment!  I feel like it should have been weird to rent out someone else’s home, but it really wasn’t.  And I got to water the plants!
Jess: It made me want to throw out all of my things and start over with better, more purposeful things. I need a photographer to redecorate my house.
Pamela: They had their books arranged by color. I have my books arranged by color! The owners of this apartment also left a very useful guide to the area – restaurants they really liked and things to see and do.

 

Verdict: We would totally use Airbnb again, but apparently people are getting weird about it? So maybe not.

The Grand Palladium-Riviera, Riviera Maya, Mexico

DSC_7123Source: jess
DSC_7262Source: jess
Pamela:
This room was bigger than my house.
Jess: There was beer in the fridge! every day!! We would feed agouti peanut butter puffins off the balcony every morning. I sometimes worry that they grew accustomed to it and are waiting. Or angry.
Pamela: …and yoga….  I did yoga on the balcony.  There was a lot of extra furniture in the room too (but not like golden girls apartment syle), which worked quite nicely when used as wet beach clothes drying racks.
Jess: I could get free wifi from the fancier (!!) rooms if I scrunched myself way up against the wall. But come on Jess- why do you need wifi in Mexico?! Go to the pool bar!!

That’s all the places we’ve been together so far. Where should we go next??

xo,

Jess & Pamela

Thanks, Ne-Yo.

Sometimes the right song comes along at the right time.

Me: I do not want to get up! And I do not want to work out and I hate all my clothes and do not want to leave the house. *pulls covers over head*

Ne-Yo: Let’s go! Make no excuses now I’m talking here and now I’m talking here and now

Me: Just 15 more minutes while I read all of Facebook, Twitter, check Instagram, and see what’s happening in my Google Reader…

Ne-Yo: Let’s go! Your time is running out I’m talking here and now I’m talking here and now

Me: OK! Fine!! Jeez!! But yesterday I didn’t work out and accidentally drank a half bottle of wine and…

Ne-Yo: It’s not about what you’ve done It’s about what you’re doing It’s all about where you going No matter where you’ve been Let’s go!
Let’s go! Let’s go! Let’s go! Let’s go!…

Me: AAAAHHHHH!!! *works out*

Me: *staring at coffee* Now I don’t have time to make a decent lunch. :\

Ne-Yo: There’s vegetables in the freezer! Oh oh oh! Mmmmm Let’s go!*

xo,

jess.

* that’s what he says there, right?

Currently Obsessed With…

Hi! Sorry we’ve been radio silent for a while. We’ve been busy, with things like:

Eating avocado toast (smash an avocado on some sprouted wheat toast. Salt. Pepper. Weep with joy.) Related: Sweet Potatoes. Seriously, use that baked potato button on the microwave, add butter (or butter alternative or hell! An avocado!!) and salt.

Stretchy pants. See, between the last two 21 day challenges, I’ve realized I have some work to do in the way of losing 20 a few pounds. The Nike Epic Women’s Training Pants are currently the only pants that love me back. See also: going to the gym and not sobbing.

give me two months and these will totally be my abs, too.

give me two months and these will totally be my abs, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seeing how many other people can’t get the damn pump to work on their Neutrogena Naturals face wash:

i am not alone!!Source: jess

I am not alone!! This picture is terrible. But trust me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bunheads.

bunheadsSource: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2006848/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kid President:

This gif of the Incredible Hulk throwing a bear:

Promise to be back more!

xo,

jess.

images:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2006848/

http://store.nike.com/us/en_us/?l=shop,pdp,ctr-inline/cid-1/pid-601190